Scott Hi-jacked

12 January
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And then one quiet evening after the dust had settled Fiff wandered out into the night alone, speaking to himself as he always had.

"You know, I’m not really sure what all of this is or was… But at least the muffins came out alright…."

"Fuck you." Replied the voice from the man who wasn’t there and Fiff ignored him… Because he wasn’t there.

"No really, had they been bunt, the house would have smelled funny." Fiff wasn’t talking to anyone inparticular.

"You don’t fucking get it do you?!" It was a non exsistent shout heard by no one. "Every fucking night we wander out after the dust settles, you talk about muffins and ignore me while I try to beat some sense into your empty head!" His anger would have been growing, but there was nothing there to grow. "How long are we going to go along with this?! Do you think I fucking care about your stupid muffins!?"

Fiff heard nothing and began to sing. "Do you know the muffin man, the muffin man, the muffin man…"

The Invisable man falls to his knees clutching the sides of his head in desperation. "Oh god no! Not the song!! Anything but the song! Sweet christ, why?!"

Fiff is still singing. "…who lives on cherry lane?" Hours pass. Fiff sings and the invisable mans pleas go unheard.

It’s 3:32am.

Fiff sits on the log of a fallen tree, humming, but the words of his tune have faded. The man who isn’t there lays at his feet, unnoticed, sobbing. "Muffins…. Always muffins… Just once, can’t we talk about something else?"

Silence…. Then Fiff began to talk again. "Yesterday… I made a batch of chocolate muffins…"

The unseen man groans and wraps his arms around his head.

"…funny thing was, when they came out, they were more black then brown…" Fiff had begun to stand as he continued his story, the same story about chocolate muffins he had told himself for 6 years.

"Do you hear me at all?!" Fiff didn’t hear him and continued his story.

"…so I placed them by the window to cool and a bear…" He was interupted, but had no idea.

"There was no fucking bear!!! You’ve never even made a god damn muffin in your life!! I should know! I’ve always been here!! I wouldn’t be surprised if you didn’t even know what to do with a muffin if you had one!!" The man huffed out of breath he wasn’t breathing.

Fiff paused… "I’ve never eaten a muffin." Tears had begun to well up in his eyes. "I’ve always wanted to you know…. Know the muffin man…" He sniffled and choked over the tune. "…the muffin man, the muffin man…. Do you know the muffin man, who lives on cherry lane….?"

The man who isn’t there sighs and puts an arm around his friend who doesn’t know him. "It’s late, lets go home." He knows they’ll do it all again tommorow night.

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